Why “Just Ignore It” Is Terrible Advice for Kids in High-Conflict Homes

We look at why “just ignore it” fails kids in high-conflict homes and show how brief, blame-free validation protects their trust and nervous system. We share practical scripts to name the hard thing, contain it, and co-regulate without fueling new fights.

• why silence teaches kids to doubt themselves
• difference between ignoring a co-parent and ignoring a child
• when non-engagement makes sense strategically
• the name it, contain it, regulate framework
• age-appropriate validation and simple scripts
• avoiding overexplaining while offering reassurance
• co-regulation tools for car rides and transitions
• applying the same approach to wider community stress

Join the Kids First Co-Parenting membership for kid-focused lessons, practical tools, and live group coaching. Learn more at the link in the show notes
Join the High Conflict Communication Bootcamp for $19. The link is in the show notes below

Kids First CoParenting System: The best membership for moms co-parenting in a high conflict dynamic. If you are co-parenting with a narcissist, dealing with a manipulative ex, or feeling overwhelmed by high-conflict dynamics, you are not alone. These resources are designed to help you protect your child’s emotional health and take back control of your co-parenting experience.

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Chapters

• 0:06 Welcome And Context
• 0:53 Parenting Amid Collective Stress
• 3:05 Why “Ignore It” Became Common Advice
• 4:35 When Ignoring Backfires With Kids
• 6:53 Strategic Times To Respond
• 12:29 What Silence Teaches Children
• 12:30 Membership: Tools And Community
• 16:43 Name It, Contain It, Regulate
• 22:18 Bootcamp: High-Conflict Communication
• 23:02 Avoidance vs. Attunement
• 25:00 Applying The Approach To Bigger World Stress
• 27:31 Closing, Core Takeaway, Disclaimer